BLUE BEARD

My husband Eric told me the "B" in his name stood for Blair. Eric B. (Blair) Winter.

But the tale below is much more accurate depiction of what the "B" symbolizes in his character.

Bluebeard and the Bloody Chamber

by Terri Windling

Though based on older folk tales of demon lovers and devilish bridegrooms, the story of Bluebeard, as we know it today, is the creation of French writer Charles Perrault — first published in 1697 in his collection Histoires ou contes du temps passé (Stories or Tales of Past Times). Perrault was one in a group of writers who socialized in the literary salons of Paris, collectively creating a vogue for literature inspired by peasant folk tales. These new stories were called contes des feés, from which our modern term "fairy tales" derives — but the contes des feés of the French salons were intended for adult readers.

Illustration by Edmund Dulac

"Bluebeard," for example, has little to recommend it as a children's story. Rather, it's a gruesome cautionary tale about the dangers of marriage (on the one hand) and the perils of greed and curiosity (on the other) — more akin, in our modern culture, to horror films than to Disney cartoons. The story as Perrault tells it is this: A wealthy man, wishing to wed, turns his attention to the two beautiful young daughters of his neighbor, a widow. Neither girl wants to marry the man because of his ugly blue beard — until he invites the girls and their mother to a party at his country estate. Seduced by luxurious living, the youngest daughter agrees to accept Bluebeard's hand. The two are promptly wed and the girl becomes mistress of his great household. Soon after, Bluebeard tells his wife that business calls him to make a long journey. He leaves her behind with all the keys to his house, his strong boxes, and his caskets of jewels, telling her she may do as she likes with them and to "make good cheer." There is only one key that she may not use, to a tiny closet at the end of the hall. That alone is forbidden, he tells her, "and if you happen to open it, you may expect my just anger and resentment."
Of course, the very first thing the young wife does is to run to the forbidden door "with such excessive haste that she nearly fell and broke her neck." She has promised obedience to her husband, but a combination of greed and curiosity (the text implies) propels her to the fatal door the minute his back is turned. She opens it and finds a shuttered room, its floor awash in blood, containing the murdered corpses of Bluebeard's previous young wives. Horrified, the young wife drops the key into a puddle of blood. Retrieving it, she locks the room and runs back to her own chamber. Now she attempts to wash the key so that her transgression will not be revealed — but no matter how long and hard she scrubs it, the bloodstain will not come off.
That very night, her husband returns — his business has been suddenly concluded. Trembling, she pretends that nothing has happened and welcomes him back. In the morning, however, he demands the return of the keys and examines them carefully. "Why is there blood on the smallest key?" he asks her craftily. Bluebeard's wife protests that she does not know how it came to be there. "You do not know?" he roars. "But I know, Madame. You opened the forbidden door. Very well. You must now go back and take your place among my other wives."

Illustration by Walter Crane

Tearfully, she delays her death by asking for time to say her prayers — for her brothers are due to visit that day, her only hope of salvation. She calls three times to her sister Anne in the tower room at the top of the house ("Sister Anne, Sister Anne, do you see anyone coming?") And at last they come, just as Bluebeard raises a sword to chop off her head. The murderous husband is dispatched, his wealth disbursed among the family, and the young wife is married again, Perrault tells us, to "a very worthy gentleman who made her forget the ill time she had passed with Bluebeard."
http://www.simultof.com/content/executive-management

Countdown to 50

Thirteen days until my birthday
I've been contemplating ritual
What ritual can I make to acknowledge what I am seeding for the rest of my life and as well what I am leaving behind in the past.
Today, I acknowledge my bitterness. I do not wish to celebrate it. I do this to face it in my attempt to heal, transform, let go, move past and at the very least no longer continue to feed it.

I don't know that bitter is even the word. I like a saying that we Woman constantly have to choose between Bitter and Better. I choose Better. I still see Bitter

It could also be called resentments and regrets.

It's the things that nag me, haunt me, keep me awake at night. None of them can be fixed or changed. they just are.

I  wish I had devoted more time to my creativity. I spent so many years being afraid of my creativity running away from it. I spent so many decades denying and ignoring it. I put creative energy into dreams which failed and disappointed me in ways that my creativity has never let me down.

How  ever much time I have left will be dedicated to creativity.

I see the double edged sword of my abilities. The very qualities which have served me most have also been present in my greatest defeats.

My belief that I could do anything, got me to New York. That belief has allowed me to win the Tony Award, write a Book, lecture, teach, it has sourced my art.

That same belief also lead me to believe that I could make relationships work when I could not. I believed that my commitment and effort would be enough. It was not.

My dreams got me out of my small life in Chicago and into my creative life in  the entertainment industry.
My dreams could not give me a husband home and family that matched the ones in the movies. I wanted to create what I didn't have. But I had no model for it. I read the books, I studied with the experts. I failed again and again and again.

A basic insecurity kept me from feeling safe with my tribe. I have often run from those who were most like me. I feared I didn't belong. I feared that I wouldn't fit.

from my earliest school day memories, I was choosing to be with the outcast kids, running way from the popular kids. the out casts didn't want me either. That sounds funny to me now. But I've always felt most comfortable with the under dogs.
And from that belief I have created situations where I was the under dog.

At fifty, I can say, I'm no under dog. I have been blessed with sooooooo much

But this is supposed to about my Bitterness. I will devote many days to my gratitude and to my blessings because they are many.

I am bitter because a loving male/female relationship has escaped me.
I am bitter because the home and family I wanted for myself and for my children has eluded me.
I am bitter because my dream of husband and home has undermined every creative aspect of my life be it in my work or with my children.

I have put a man first. And the men I put first were a mirror image of the lack of worth I felt in myself.

My spiritual advisor once said "Tonya you are always picking up the broken beer bottle lying in the mud and taking it home and trying to turn it into a beautiful vase"

That is true. I saw these men's potential. I ignored their history. As I saw myself as lacking. I believed their lack matched my own and that we would rise and conquer together.

I didn't even recognize my own accomplishments . I didn't see that I was not as lacking as the men I chose.

I am bitter because my choices have left a terrible legacy for my children to follow. I feel responsible for that too.

I am bitter for my ignorance, my stupidity, my inflexibility, my heard headedness.

But as I write it I also know that I embrace and love those parts of me too.

Maybe the bitterness is transforming even now.
If so this writing has been worth much

I am filling up with joy at how much I have been given, at how many people have been good to me.

Bitter is running out
Bitter where are you hiding? I know you are still there lurking waiting to sabotage me in the tracks of my confident swagger.

You have moved on for the moment.

You will return.
and with keypad and finger tip
I will banish you again

The Contradictions of Miscegenation

I had the privilege of watching S. Epatha Merkerson's THE CONTRADICTIONS OF FAIR HOPE.

It is a brilliant documentary on the history of slavery in the country and the evolution of the organizations which rose up in the wake of emancipation.

There is a line in the script written eloquently by Rockell Metcalf that has stuck with me. The film called to my attention and aspect of slavery that had previously never occurred to me. The line was something like"
"in the wake of emancipation four million black men and women were loosed into a Capitalist economy with no capital"
Holy shit!

I had contemplated the torture, the rape, the kidnapping, the forced free labor, the deprivation of identity, language, religion, the lynchings, the systematic continuation of slavery which continues even today. I had never contemplated that emancipation left people who were property one day and left them as nonentities the next day.
The had no where to live, no food, no clothes, the jobs, no money
There was no infrastructure put in place to provide for the people whose backs and free labor built the entirety of the US economy.

It is a wonder that white people didn't just hunt and kill the free slaves. There justification for the worst slavery in the history of mankind was that we were not human.

The reparations have not been made. Can never be made.

In the same way that I have experienced men being unable to stand in the shadow of the power of women, caucasians cannot stand in the shadow of the power of the African people.
The struggles of women and of blacks run along parallel lines.

THE CONTRADICTIONS OF FAIR HOPE has won the top honor at every black tim festival it has participated in all over the globe.  Forty (40) not exclusively black festivals have turned it down.

You tell me why.

Mother's Day 2012

I had a hissy fit on  Facebook yesterday in response to a friend's post "Are You Mom or Mother Enough"

It hit me, mother's are in the minority on the planet. We are the most over worked, under paid, unrepresented but attacked group through out history.

I find it akin to being black or female. All manner of people who are not what I am, take  it upon themselves to speak about and for me, to tell me how to do me better because they know better without having ever walked a minute in my shoes.

The denigration of mother is at the root of all the ills on our planet. Earth is all species mother. We pollute our food and water supplies with the same wanton abandon that we attack and blame our mothers. Without earth, without mother their is no us,  there is nothing.

Birth mother is primacy. You never escape the connection to HER. Whether you are adopted, abandoned, orphaned, the entirety of your life is umbilically linked to bonds forged in utero and beyond. the birth bond is eternal. It directs all of us all of our lives.

As long as we reject, assault, attack and blame mother...

We cannot be healthy or whole

Happy Mother's Day to all of the women who have the constitutional right to be called MOTHER!

Online Dating Dangers

Found these articles about online dating con men.

http://jezebel.com/5885453/it-looks-like-the-montauk-grifter-conned-gordon-ramsay-too?tag=food

http://jezebel.com/5737806/okcupid-profile+fraud-is-the-crime-youd-never-expect

There is really no way to stop these. All great technologies i.e.: the internet are double edged swords. For each new freedom they provide, there is an equal trap present as well.

I gave up on online dating for a number of reasons. First, it really is a way for men to get free sex. I am not against prostitution. So ladies don't give it away. Most of the hundred plus men I spoke with or went out with were lying about some of everything.

There was the "separated" guy who lived in the basement of the house with his wife and kids HA!

And the number of marriage proposals if I'd only have sex First were too numerous to list.

My experience is that the men I met really would say and do ANYTHING to get what they wanted. What each wanted was different.

Eric Winter conned me into marrying him because it fed his need to have a trophy wife and to snub his ex-wife Sakeena Hamill by marrying someone who was more of a "nigger" than she was. Sakeena is half Pakistani and he called her  the nigger of Great Britain.

I left OHCUPID when Eric Winter started searching me there and sending our profile match. We came up as something like a 96% match. Now remember ladies if you're posting on the social networks there is a lot of information in the public domain about you. So it's easy for men to gather the information, fill in the blanks and present themselves as your Prince Charming. This is what Eric Winter did to me.

My girl, Trae Harris said she had a guy in her apartment who had created an entire fake identity based on what he read about her on MySpace. He told her he went to school with her. She was so happy that she found a kindred soul and school mate that she got sucked in.

The articles above detail some horrible things that have happened to women from men they met online. Online dating is big business and the media doesn't mess with the folks who pay their bills so don't expect too much main stream press about this.

Because Eric Winter had spyware on my computer from the beginning of our dating he was able to give me the illusion of being a soul mate. Eric  finished my sentences, gifted me things I had only imagined owning. The key logger on my computers sent him a message of every keystroke, every search I performed.

It was only when Eric began picking fights with me over things I knew I hadn't spoken aloud that I began to suspect that he was hacking my email. The key loggers were something worse than I could ever imagine.

Eric Winter had something on my IPHONE as well. One night I had a call with a friend and joked about Eric Winter losing his wallet and thirty seconds from the end of the call, he was on the phone berating me for laughing about his loss.

Eric scared the bejeezus out of me. I thought it was the drugs and alcohol and I reached out to his family for an intervention. They turned their back on me. I now suspect that they knew about his problems and they didn't want to get involved. You can't be as psych as Eric is a hide it from your family your whole life. But because he could maintain a good job, they were probably just grateful and wanted to maintain their denial.

If it were only that simple. However, Eric's brother's Mark Winter and Bruce Winter joined in on the scam and abuse. Mark, an accountant created a fake accounting statement to hide that Eric had underpaid his taxes and to get me to sign a joint tax return under the pretense that it would save us money. I saw right through it so Eric just threatened me constantly to sign the return.

Eric credits his brother, Bruce Winter with helping him devise the plan to cut us off financially and throw me and my children out on the streets. Nice family huh! Rich,  prominent.

Descendants of slave owners and they proudly display the deed to prove it.

Eric Winter is still seeking Black women to work out his racist revenge for begging oppressed by blacks as a poor white Maryland school boy.



His OKcupid profile follows. This is an example of how a dysfunctional man presents himself in an online dating profile

His Details

                                                                           (WHILE I WAS STILL IN THE DARK)

Ethnicity

White

Height

5′ 10″ (1.78m).

Body Type

Fit

Diet

Mostly anything

Smokes

No

Drinks

Socially

Drugs

Never

Religion

Christianity but not too serious about it

Sign

Libra but it doesn’t matter

Education

Graduated from college/university

Job

Executive / Management

Income

Rather not say

Offspring

Has kids

Pets

Likes dogs and has cats

Speaks

English

My self-summary

DISCLAIMER AND FULL DISCLOSURE: I AM MOVING TO HOWARD COUNTY MARYLAND (PROBABLY ELLICOTT CITY) AT THE END OF FEBRUARY 2012. I CURRENTLY RESIDE IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, BUT I AM GLAD TO BE RETURNING TO MY HOME STATE. I AM "TESTING THE WATERS" SO TO SPEAK, SO IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO CONTACT ME, PLEASE DO, BUT I WILL NOT BE IN MARYLAND VERY OFTEN OVER THE NEXT 8 WEEKS (JUST A FEW DAYS FOR HOUSE HUNTING). BUT I WOULD LOVE TO START A CONVERSATION IF YOU HAVE AN INTEREST.

I am a man who is secure, successful, accomplished and happy in his skin. I have been blessed with many gifts in my life, most important are my son and daughter. I am optimistic, intelligent, multi-talented and I handle whatever life throws at me efficiently and with dignity. Oh yes, and I am humble.

Integrity is my key value, and I am proud to be recognized for practicing it professionally and personally. I have had the privilege of traveling to about 40 different countries, and I have an open mind and outlook on many things as a result.

I have a youthful approach to life that some would call a "swagger." Yet I am responsible and reliable. I meet my obligations.

My passion is humor. A good laugh is a great medicine for almost anything. I love to joke and laugh. I think the ability to laugh together is paramount. I have often been told I can lift the spirit of a group of people with my presence and attitude. I believe that people can have fun and perhaps be silly, but there is also a time to be serious and take care of business when required. I can find humor in even difficult situations, often at my own expense.

I am looking for a woman who takes care of herself and is self sufficient, but enjoys being treated like a lady by a kind, secure and generous man. When I am in an exclusive relationship I provide nothing less than faithfulness, loyalty and monogamy, and I expect the same in return. I am not really interested in juggling multiple contacts from this service, or "serial dating."

My teenage children (13 and 14) are my first priority. If you need to be placed ahead of them completely, you should not contact me. My partner will hold a special place in my heart and life, and will take priority in many ways. But my children are my primary responsibility at this time. There is a balance that can be reached and constantly negotiated. My children will be grown and gone at some point, so I want to enjoy them while I can, and they need me very much at their age.

Most of all I am looking for a lady who shares my quirky (perhaps goofy) sense of humor. If we can laugh together, every day, all the rest falls in place.

My Grandmother often said "I am rich with love!" I am very fortunate in that regard, but I crave the connection of my partner, wherever and whoever she is...

What I’m doing with my life

Caring for my two teenage children. Moving on to a new home, a new job and trying to find find a sincere and secure partner who can accompany me.

I’m really good at

Most anything I set my mind to.

Making people laugh, providing and protecting.

Grilling.

The first things people usually notice about me

Self-confidence, sense of humor, smile, wit, intelligence, humility :-)

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Performing arts, classical music, sushi. Stephen King, Spartacus, Jeopardy, The Tudors.

The six things I could never do without

My children

My Father and Brothers

My friends

My sense of humor

My integrity

My iPhone

I spend a lot of time thinking about

My children, work, sports, my future partner, how people interact. how things work. What's for dinner?

On a typical Friday night I am

With one or both of my children. Cooking, watching a movie or driving them around.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit

I'll tell you when we talk. It is private.

I’m looking for

• Girls who like guys
• Ages 42-53
• Near me
• For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, activity partners

Send him a message

Interested? Go ahead…

Albums » Profile Photos

 Report

 Report

My brother's 55th in Vegas, November 2011

 Report

Lumahai Beach, Kauai, September 2011

 Report

 Report

Cabo, swimming in Jeans 2010

etb1983's public match questions

If you were dating someone you really cared about and they told you they had had a bad sexual experience and were going to need time and support to be comfortable having sex with you, would you be willing to be patient and move at their pace?

 No.

 No.

If a person has been out of college for several years and is making an earnest effort to find work, but not getting anywhere, would you consider dating them?

 No

 No

If/when you have NO pressing obligations (employment, schooling, children, errands, bedtime, or other factors aside), at what time do you prefer to get up in the morning?

 Early bird gets the worm! I'm up before the sun!

 Early bird gets the worm! I'm up before the sun!

Which do you prefer?

 Bath

 Bath

Answer

Do you believe a couple should live together before considering marriage?

Would you open your spouse's personal mail?

 We're a couple, who cares?

 We're a couple, who cares?

Do you find arrogance to be a turn-on?

 Yes.

 Yes. In small doses

Answer

Would you date a comic book geek?

Answer

Do you enjoy outdoor activites such as camping, hiking or fishing?

Have you ever taken any pills hoping they would help you lose weight?

 Yes

 Yes

• What is your opinion on Walmart?

 Retail heaven

 Just another corporation

After dating someone for a while, you finally get to see where they live. He/she leaves you alone to go take a quick shower. Would you snoop?

 Yes.

 No.

Would you date someone who's smart but achieved nothing in life?

 No

 No

Could you date someone who used anti-depressants?

 No

 No

How do you feel about women openly displaying tattoos?

 I Dislike It

 I Don't Mind

Some friends invite you to go camping where there are no showers, no toilets, and no services. The only luxuries would be those you could carry in a pack on your back. Do you go?

 No.

 Yes.

Do you like large dogs?

 No.

 Yes.

Do you currently own or have you ever owned a suit/dress that cost $1000 or more?

 Yes

 Yes

Is "foreplay" necessary for good sex?

 No

 No

Would you enjoy a night in playing video games?

 No

 Yes

Would you date someone who still lives with his/her parents?

 No

 No

Do you enjoy long camping trips? (longer than 3 nights)

 I don't like to camp.

 I like to camp, but not long trips.

Who do you think was smartest on this list?

 Mozart

 Einstein Especially if you believe that Shakespeare's work was written by the Countess of Pembroke, Mary Sydney Herbert

Could you live a life full of travelling?

 No

 Yes

Do you ever feel socially awkward?

 No.

 Yes.

Would you date someone who is bisexual?

 No

 No

Do you space out or daydream a lot?

 Rarely / never

 All the time

Answer

Would you prefer someone extremely mellow or extremely hyper?

Imagine that your partner has a horrible accident and is left in a coma and on life support. The odds of improvement are nil. Your partner's living will states that life support should be removed in this scenario. Which would you do?

 Remove the life support immediately.

 Remove the life support immediately.

Would you date someone who has never been in any kind of relationship before?

 No

 No

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Is global warming a serious problem?

Are you still in love with one or more of your former partners?

 Yes - One of them.

 No.

Would you be willing to adopt a child?

 No

 No

Rate your self-confidence:

 Very, very high

 Higher than average Once again...I don't believe everything I read

Answer

Star Trek...cool or uncool?

Do you have a child or children?

 Yes

 Yes

Could you date someone who was really quiet?

 No

 Yes

Would you dump someone simply because they weren't good at sex?

 Yes

 Yes

If evil forces made you choose to either watch tv OR read books for the rest of your life, you would:

 watch tv

 read books

How important to you is being with family during holidays?

 Not important.

 Somewhat important.

Is your ideal sex rough or gentle?

Answer

Do you like to play drinking games?

You're dating someone new. You discover that they have a room-mate the same sex as you. This:

 Makes you feel uncomfortable

 Doesn't phase you one bit

If you were visiting a new city, where would you be most excited to go?

 Tourist attractions or entertainment venues.

 Places popular with the locals.

How often are you influenced by peer pressure?

 Sometimes

 Rarely

Do you believe in an energy field that surrounds us that we can manipulate through reiki, acupuncture, chakra balancing, yoga, or some other system?

 No, and I would never practice one of these healin

 Yes, and I practice one of these healing arts.

Do you think that a person's musical preferences are a good indicator of intelligence?

 Yes.

 No.

Generally, in life, what makes you happier?

 Variety

 Variety

What makes a better friend?

 Quick wit and a mischievous smile

 Compassionate nature and a shoulder to support you

How many dates does it take for a potential significant other to get a good sense of who you are as a person?

 More than five

 Less than five

Do you have names planned out for future children?

 No, and I'm not planning on any future children.

 No, and I'm not planning on any future children.

Which best describes your political beliefs?

 Centrist

 Liberal / Left-wing

Answer

Were you picked on a lot in school?

If someone asked you, "What's the worst thing you've ever done?" would you know the answer right away?

 Yes

 Yes

How important is it for you to give expensive gifts on a regular basis when in a relationship?

 Somewhat important.

 Not at all important.

Is it a requirement that you communicate every day with your significant other (via phone, text, in person, whatever)?

 Yes, no matter what

 Yes, unless otherwise specified

Orgasms are clearly the most important part of sex.

 I agree.

 I disagree.

Would it bother you if your partner kept pictures of previous partner(s)?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Have you used psychedelic drugs (LSD, mescaline, peyote, etc.) or would you like to?

 Yes

 Yes I've never used them. I'm curious but may never try them

Have you ever written something on the wall of a public toilet?

 Yes

 No

How often do you wash your dishes?

 When I run out of clean utensils.

 Daily.

Which word describes you better?

 Intense

 Intense

Would you--for any reason--read your mate's email or pose as him/her online, without his/her knowledge and permission?

 Only if I suspected them of something.

 No, I'd trust them and that would be invasive.

Answer

Would you allow your partner to kiss you after performing oral sex on you?

How much would you enjoy hosting a big, crazy party?

 Not at all

 Not that much

Would you let your children under 13 watch movies with full nudity?

 Yes

 Yes

Goth chicks!!!!

 I don't know

 I don't know

Should prostitution be legal?

 Yes, absolutely

 Yes, absolutely For adults only

Could you date someone with no long-term goals?

 No

 No

Star Wars or Star Trek?

 I can't decide.

 Star Trek

Assume you have a homosexual friend who is the same gender as you. Would it bother you if they hugged you?

 Only if I thought the hug was more than friendly.

 No.

Would you allow a pet to sleep on your bed?

 Maybe.

 Maybe.

Approximately how many hours per week do you dedicate to spiritual activity?

 One hour or less.

 One to four hours.

Would you consider being in a relationship with someone who has had homosexual sex?

 I'm Not Sure / Depends how serious it was

 No

Are you Christian?

 Yes

 Yes

Does smoking disgust you?

 Yes

 Yes

Could you date someone who has strong political opinions that are the exact opposite of yours?

 No

 No

Do you believe that men should be the heads of their households?

 Yes

 No

Answer

Which are you closer to being?

Regardless of where you grew up or now live, which of the following best describes the way you see yourself at heart?

 I am a suburbanite.

 I am an urban or city person.

Which would do more to improve the world?

 This question upsets me

 This question upsets me

Would you be willing to date a person who had oral herpes (cold sores)? Would you date someone who has cold-sores (oral herpes)?

 Yes.

 No.

Can you recite your favorite poem from memory?

 Yes.

 No.

Do you often make jokes that offend more uptight people?

 Yes

 No

Which makes for a better relationship?

 Dedication

 Dedication

If I had to choose among the following for an ideal romantic partner, I'd choose:

 Someone smart and kind.

 Someone smart and kind.

If you're in a relationship you expect will last for the rest of your life, is it important to you that it be the most satisfying sexual relationship you have ever had?

 No

 Yes

Answer

Would you rather...

Would you prefer good things happened, or interesting things?

 Interesting Good things are usually interesting anyway, and interesting things are good.

 Good

Would you consider dating someone whose religion or spirituality is the primary focus in their life?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

Do you go to great lengths to avoid conflict?

Do you believe in an afterlife/life after death/resurrection?

 I'm Not Sure

 I'm Not Sure

Personally, is fornication in public much hotter than plain old indoor sex?

 I'm Not Sure / Wouldn't know

 No

What's your deal with harder drugs (stuff beyond pot)?

 I've done drugs in the past, but no longer.

 I never do drugs.

Which typically comes first for you?

 Play

 Work

Do you believe in miracles?

 No

 Yes

Biting?

 No

 No

Answer

Would being in the same room with a couple of friends who are having sex bother you?

Do you enjoy meaningless sex?

 No

 No

Do you find the idea of shaving a partner's pubic hair exciting?

 No.

 No.

Would you be willing to date someone who plays video games almost every day, for at least 2 hours?

 No.

 Yes, but I would not play that much.

Choose the better romantic activity:

 Kissing in Paris

 Kissing in Paris

Go public

In general, are you a competitive person?

 Answer publicly to see my public answer

 Sometimes / rarely

Tattoos on a woman's lower back are...

 Tramp stamps.

 Something I have no opinion on.

Which best describes your personal feelings about sports?

 I play or watch sports often.

 I play or watch sports occasionally.

Answer

How confident are you in your sexual abilities?

Do you work out a lot?

 Yes

 No

Are you more horny or more lonely?

 Lonely

 Horny

How important is religion/God in your life?

 Not very important

 Somewhat important

etb1983's public match questions

How important is money/wealth for you in a match?

 Somewhat important

 Somewhat important

Answer

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?

If "some men are doctors" and "some doctors are tall", does it follow that "some men are tall"?

 No

 Yes

What kind of shape are you in?

 Great

 Average

Answer

When a relationship ends, what's the best thing to do?

Do you like wild parties?

 No

 No

Answer

Would you enjoy going to an all night dance party?

Answer

Do you laugh when somebody trips and falls?

Do spelling mistakes annoy you?

 Yes

 No

Would you date someone just for the sex?

 No

 Yes

How many albums are there in your music collection?

 101 to 300 albums. I used to have hundreds but they were stolen

 I have no music albums.

Do you believe in the term "meant to be"? As in fate or destiny with another person?

 Yes

 No

Is your ideal match well-off financially (or at the very least someone who has high income potential)?

 It's somewhat important.

 It's somewhat important.

Do you wish things like vampires, fairies, werewolves, ghosts, or something along those lines were real?

 No

 No

Answer

Do you require caffeine, nicotine, or other substances in order to feel like "yourself" after you wake up?

Would you do something outrageous, stupid or adventurous simply because it would make a good story to tell later? (Assume there would be no serious consequences to your actions.)

 Yes, but nothing too crazy.

 Maybe, depends on what and who with.

Answer

Which is better: sex without sleeping together or sleeping together without sex?

Answer

Do you find it disturbing that products are still tested on animals?

How often should your significant other buy you gifts, jewelry, or other things more expensive than, say, dinner, cards, or flowers?

 From time to time.

 Very frequently.

Does silence make you uncomfortable?

 No

 No

If you could have brilliant skill at something, would you prefer:

Answer

Are you a gambler?

Answer

Do you enjoy provoking people just to get a response.

Should burning your country's flag be illegal?

 No

 No

Do you carry condoms?

 Never

 Sometimes

Do you recycle?

 Sometimes

 Sometimes

Do you prefer the people in your life to be simple or complex?

 Complex

 Complex

Answer

While in the middle of the best lovemaking of your life, if your lover asked you to squeal like a dolphin, would you?

During a romantic evening at your significant others' house, he or she puts on a slow song and asks you to dance. How would you respond?

 I think its corny, but I'll do it anyway!

 Very romantic! I'm up for it!

Roughly how many books have you read in the past year?

 Less than five

 Between five and fifteen

What's your opinion of the phrase "making love" when it refers to sex?

 It's beautiful.

 It's beautiful.

Answer

Are you a 'double dipper'? In other words, do you ever take a bite of food and then dip it back into a shared sauce or dip?

Is a tongue stud a turn-on?

 No

 No

Do you enjoy discussing politics?

 Yes

 No

Answer

In a potential mate, is ditzyness a turn-on or a turn-off?

How important is it to you to have your own unique "thing" (like a weekly Girls' Night Out or Guys' Movie Night) that you don't share with your partner(s)?

 Not much - I like sharing stuff with my partner

 Very - I need some ME time to be happy

Answer

Is it okay for men to wear makeup?

When it comes to art, do you prefer works that are abstract or representational?

 Representational.

 Representational.

Answer

When having sex, do you like to have your hair pulled?

Do you believe in the power of prayer?

 No

 Yes

Are you attracted to dangerous situations?

 No

 No

Do you litter?

 Rarely

 Never

Pick the best date on this list:

 A really nice restaurant

 A day at the beach

Is it easier to love or to hate?

 Love

 Hate

Answer

Do you enjoy dark, violent, or disturbing music?

Would you develop a new hobby/cultivate a new interest just to have something in common with your partner?

 Maybe, but only if it seemed cool

 Maybe, but only if it seemed cool

Could you live without the Internet?

 Yes

 Yes We have the Internet but I lived without it before it existed and I'm sure I could do it again. And I do vacations without it

Could you date someone who was really messy?

 Yes I like to be tidy, but hey I have two teenagers and life is busy.

 Yes So long as we could afford to hire someone to keep things clean

How often do you try new things (food, activities, music, whatever) that you've never tried before?

 Several times per year.

 Several times per week, or more.

Is it possible to love someone you don't even like?

 Yes

 Yes Family members are good examples

I talk about my previous relationships:

 Occasionally

 Almost never, unless explicitly asked about them.

Are you a beer snob?

 Not usually, but some beers I won't touch.

 No

How would you describe your body?

 Athletic

 Voluptuous

Answer

Hypothetically, do you think you would be good at being a porn star?

Answer

If you were offered the opportunity to eat human meat prepared any way you like, would you at least try it?

How shy would you say you are?

 Not really shy

 Kind of shy

Do you think women have an obligation to keep their legs shaved?

 Yes

 No

If you had to name your greatest motivation in life thus far, what would it be?

 Love

 Expression

How clear to you are your goals in life?

 Very clear.

 Very clear.

Do you often find yourself wanting to chuck it all and go to live on a sailboat?

 No

 No

etb1983's public match questions

Answer

Do you like to watch sports on television?

Do you like to leave music on while you sleep?

 Yes, but I don't need it to fall asleep.

 No, but I can deal with it if my partner does.

Do you have a desire (even if it's secret) to take part in sexual activities involving bondage?

 No

 No

Answer

Do you keep your sexual exploits private?

Which character best represents your personality? (if you don't know/remember the characters, just go by the description)

 Bugs Bunny - creative & versatile

 Bugs Bunny - creative & versatile

Does your ideal schedule involve staying up very late at night and sleeping during the day?

 No

 No

You're in a new relationship and your partner admits that they have had 14 sexual partners. Does that sound like a lot to you?

 That seems like an average number.

 That seems like an average number.

Which of these is likely to make you more nervous?

 A promising first date

 An important interview

Answer

Once a cheater, always a cheater.

Answer

Have you ever tried any sexual roleplaying, such as student/teacher or patient/nurse?

Have you ever spent more than 8 hours straight playing video games?

 NO.

 Yes

Would you like to play naked Twister with a group of people?

 No.

 No.

If your partner made a lot of noise while enjoying sex, would this be a turn-on or turn-off for you?

 Either, depending upon how they sound.

 Either, depending upon how they sound.

Does it bother you when people say "PIN number" or "ATM machine"?

 Why would it?

 Why would it?

Answer

Which of these four is sexiest?

Do you often find yourself worrying about things that you have no control over?

 No

 No

Are you okay with people who grow marijuana for their own personal use?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Answer

When I consume alcohol, it is generally:

Are you an aspiring actor/artist/writer or other creative type?

 No

 No I am successful professional creative person

Which is more offensive: book burning or flag burning?

 book burning

 book burning

Do you feel like you're still hurting from something that happened to you a long time ago?

Would you rather live in the big city or a small town?

 Big city

 Big city

Excluding for work or school, how many hours per day do you spend on your computer?

 1-2

 more than 4

Generally, do you enjoy being drunk?

 No

 No

What's your relationship with marijuana?

 I smoked in the past, but no longer.

 Never.

Do you believe morality is universal, or relative?

 Relative

 Universal

Are you ready to settle down and get married right now?

 Get married no, settle down yes.

 No way.

Which pubic hair style do you prefer for a partner?

 Neatly trimmed.

 It doesn't matter.

How important are your political beliefs to you?

 Somewhat important

 A little important

Which of the following types of intelligence do you most value?

 Social / Interpersonal

 Logical / Mathematical

etb1983's public match questions

Would you be okay with your significant other spending a lot of time with one of his/her exes (as a friend)?

 No

 Yes

How do you feel about age differences in relationships?

 I prefer someone close to my own age

 Doesn't matter to me

Would you rather play Scrabble, go out dancing, or get drunk?

 Scrabble

 Scrabble

How often do you meditate?

 Never.

 Rarely.

Which of the following character flaws would you be LEAST tolerant of in a potential partner?

 Apathy.

 Dependency.

Do you believe you've lived past lives?

 No, I do not believe this is possible.

 Maybe, but there is no way to really know.

In a serious relationship, do you feel it's important to keep your significant other informed of the details of your day-to-day life?

 Yes

 Some

How much do other people's opinions of you influence your decisions?

 Some

 Not at all

How much do you go "clubbing" (out dancing in bars)?

 Never

 Never

Which would you prefer your ideal match to be more into?

 Music

 Books

I prefer to sleep ...

 Touching my partner

 Embracing / cuddling my partner

Should evolution and creationism be taught side-by-side in school?

 No, creationism has no place in schools

 No, creationism has no place in schools

Should pharmacies be allowed to sell preparations that you can take to commit painless and effective suicide?

 Yes, but only if certain criteria are met.

 Yes, without restrictions.

Could you date someone who does drugs?

 No

 Yes, but only soft stuff like marijuana The line I am unwilling to cross is addiction and behavior that disrupts daily activity

Do you care about other people's suffering?

 It depends on the kind of suffering

 Yes, solidarity is important

Underarms can be a hairy subject. How do you maintain your pits?

 Occasionally I'll trim.

 I shave consistently.

What kind of rides do you like at amusement parks?

 The biggest or most thrilling ones.

 The biggest or most thrilling ones.

Do you have a problem with authority?

 No

 No

Do you enjoy intellectual debates on topics like politics, religion, science or philosophy?

 I love to argue!

 Sometimes.

If it were legal to do so where you live, would you smoke marijuana?

 No.

 Yes.

How does your maturity level compare with most people your age?

 I'm average

 I'm more mature

Other things being equal, would you be more attracted to an artist or a scientist?

 An artist.

 A scientist.

Do you like the taste of beer?

 Yes

 No

How long do you believe people need to be in a relationship before before getting married?

 At least 1 year

 At least 2 years

Have you ever cosplayed? (Dressed up as a comic/anime character)

 No, and I wouldn't be interested

 No, and I wouldn't be interested

Let's say you are in line at a grocery store and have many items. The person behind you just has only one or two. Do you offer to let them go ahead of you?

 Yes. Always.

 Yes, unless I am otherwise in a hurry.

How often do you use profane language?

 Often

 Once in a while We are talking about cursing right? I don't know any adults who don't curse sometimes.

Answer

Is it easy for you to achieve orgasm?

Are politics interesting?

 Sometimes

 Sometimes

Are politics interesting?

 Sometimes

 Sometimes

Are you generally able to forgive and forget?

 It really depends on the circumstances.

 Yes.

Are you a cat person or a dog person?

 Both

 Neither

Do superficial people, who place a high emphasis on physical appearance, annoy you?

 Sometimes

 Sometimes

Could you easily obtain illegal drugs through your social network?

 No.

 No.

If given the chance, would you rather learn to play a musical instrument or learn to speak another language?

 Play a musical instrument.

 Speak another langauge.

Answer

Do you make any special efforts to support small, independent businesses instead of the big chains?

Answer

How does the idea of being slapped hard in the face during sex make you feel?

How are you most likely to show your partner you care?

 Actions: Do something nice (like a date or errand)

 Touch: Give them a hug, massage or kiss

Genital piercings...

 Ouch, no thanks.

 Ouch, no thanks.

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• He publicly answered
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Do you keep a budget (of your finances)?

 Yes

 Sometimes

Answer

Would you consider roleplaying out a rape fantasy with partner who asked you to?

Answer

How important is voting to you?

If your partner wanted you to say a specific phrase during sex, would you?

 Yes, I'd say anything they want me to.

 Yes, I'd say anything they want me to.

In a relationship I like to discuss politics with my partner.

 Sure. I'm interested in sharing our beliefs.

 Sometimes. It depends.

How frequently do you go out of your way to make others feel appreciated?

 Way more than average

 Way more than average

Would you prefer the lights on or off during sex?

 On

 It's exactly the same to me

Do you prefer?

 Average Men/Women

 Average Men/Women

Can you run a mile without stopping?

 Yes - And More

 Yes

Your significant other is perfectly content with their minimum wage job and has no plans to look for more challenging/better paying work. Is this a problem?

 Somewhat, but it's their life.

 Yes, I wouldn't be able to tolerate that.

About how long do you want your next relationship to last?

 The rest of my life I might convince you to change YOUR answer!

 Several years Ugh, none of us can predict the future. I want to be blessed and to be a blessing in the life of whomever I encounter for however long it lasts

Karaoke?

 Absolutely!

 Absolutely!

Do you get angry when you lose a game?

 Sometimes

 Never

Do you ever get inspired to make something creative for no reason in particular?

 Sometimes

 Very Often

Are you looking for a partner to have children with?

 No

 No

Answer

Do you believe in ghosts?

Do you believe in God?

 Yes

 Yes

Would you ever date or mess around with a good friend's ex?

 Yes, but only with my friend's permission

 No

Answer

How open are you to trying new things in bed?

Is the left or right hemisphere of your brain dominant?

 Both! My hemispheres are co-dominant!

 Both! My hemispheres are co-dominant!

etb1983's public match questions

Are some human lives worth more than others?

 No

 No

Which of the following best describes your typical demeanor?

 Cheerful! I have a positive outlook.

 Cheerful! I have a positive outlook.

Once you're intimate, how often would you and your significant other have sex?

 About every other day

 About every other day

In a certain light, couldn't being homeless be exciting?

 No

 No

Answer

Under the right circumstances, would you allow a partner to lick your anus?

If you discovered a spider on the wall in your bedroom, which would you do?

 Kill it.

 Find someone else to deal with it.

Do you ever use the word "gay" as an insult or pejorative?

 No

 No

Which of these options most closely describes what you're looking for in your next relationship?

 Someone to come home to

 Someone to come home to

When in a relationship, what importance do you place upon celebrating weekly or monthly anniversaries?

 Low.

 Low.

Does your partner have to be an active reader?

 No

 Yes

Have you ever drawn your own comic?

 No

 Yes, for my own amusement/purposes

Do you enjoy Rap/Hip-Hop?

 Some

 Yes

How organized are the files on your computer?

 Somewhat - I can find most things

 Scattered - Everything thrown together

If you had to pick one of the following "types" of people for a significant other, which would it be?

 Crazy and colorful

 Crazy and colorful

Do you leave the lights on after leaving a room when they are no longer necessary?

 Rarely or never - That would be wasteful.

 Sometimes - I try to save energy but do forget.

Answer

How do you feel about zoos?

What's the gender distribution of the vocalists in your music collection?

 Mostly male singers.

 Mostly female singers.

Which word describes you better?

 Private

 Social

Could you date someone with abnormal amounts of body hair?

 No

 I don't know Who wants anything abnormal?

Someone you're very attracted to admits to having a tickling fetish. Would you let them tickle you?

 Maybe, I think I'd enjoy if limits are respected.

 No way!

To you, which adjective best describes hopeless, unrequited love?

 Romantic

 Foolish

How important is art in your daily life?

 Somewhat Important

 Very Important

Would you stay in a relationship if your significant other told you, "I no longer feel that deep love I once felt for you, but I'm willing to stay together until I work through this"?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you own your own country's flag?

 No

 No

How long would you have to talk to someone online before you felt comfortable to meet?

 A few days

 I'd meet right away if their profile were cool

Would you get upset if your girlfriend/boyfriend flirted in front of you?

 Yes

 Yes

How much do you spend per year for shoes?

 $101 - $ 500

 More than a $1000

Writing as a profession is...?

 No better or worse than any other

 A most admirable profession

Could you fall in love with someone you have only talked to online?

 No.

 No.

Group sex (with 3 or more people):

 I have little or no interest.

 I have little or no interest.

Imagine you have a significant other who reveals they have a video tape of a sexual encounter from a prior relationship and offers to show it to you. Would you want to see it?

 No.

 No.

It's your first date with someone you recently met. At the end she/he says "I think I love you."

 Scary

 Scary

Do you believe in karma?

 Yes

 Yes

How do you think your sex drive compares to what is typical for other people of your age and gender?

 My sex drive is about average.

 My sex drive is higher than average.

Have you smoked a cigarette in the last 6 months?

 No

 No

Answer

When chatting with a potential friend/significant other online, is use of proper grammar and spelling important to you?

Which is worse: starving children or abused animals?

 Starving children.

 Starving children.

Is there a such thing as having had too many sex partners?

 Yes

 No

Would you consider having an open relationship (i.e., one where you can see other people)?

 No

 No The relationship is open until we commit to exclusivity. You can sleep with whomever you choose while we "date"
I am not willing to sleep with anyone without an exclusive commitment but until that time what you do is none of my business

Which of the following persona, in other people, do you admire the most?

 Child at Heart; responsible when needed.

 Devout; given themselves to higher orders.

etb1983's public match questions

Do you like hickies?

 No

 No

How trusting are you where it concerns your government?

 Somewhat.

 Not at all.

How much does physical attractiveness matter to you in a match?

 A lot

 A lot

What's the highest level of education you've completed? (Note: you can also indicate this on your profile page)

 College

 College

Answer

Imagine you are on a romantic first date and find a hair in your food. It appears to have come from a source other than you or your date. Which would likely be closest to your response?

Is intoxication ever an acceptable excuse for acting stupid?

 No.

 No.

Which is closest to your reaction to foul language?

 It's ok as long as it isn't every other word.

 It's ok as long as it isn't every other word.

Answer

Sharing a toothbrush with your partner is...

Do you like to celebrate holidays?

 Depends which holiday it is

 I have no preference

Answer

What is your opinion of couples who frequently say "I love you" to one another?

What haircolor, or shade, do you prefer?

 I have no preference

 I have no preference

Consider the recent fictional movies you have watched. Which of the following aspects do you find most disturbing?

 None of the above disturbs me.

 Racial or cultural stereotyping.

How important are academic achievements to you?

 Somewhat important.

 Somewhat important.

Do you enjoy watching educational programming on television?

 Yes - On occasion.

 Yes - On occasion.

Answer

Would you date someone who is a passionate fan of your favorite sports team's biggest rival?

Answer

Straight women who kiss or fondle each other in clubs in the hopes of attracting men are...

How much do you usually tip a server who did a fine job?

 15-20%

 15-20%

Do you (or would you) like to go hunting?

 No

 No

How messy are you?

 I'm average

 I'm average

What is your opinion concerning strip clubs?

 They can be fun every once and a while.

 They can be fun every once and a while.

Do you like to argue?

 No

 Yes Argue as in debate. Not as in fight

How often do you 'take it out' on other people when you're having a bad day?

 Occasionally.

 Never.

Which would you rather be?

 Weird I have a broad range of experiences and am somewhat of an enigma. That does not mean my partner must be the same.

 Weird In today's culture normal and acceptable behavior borders on pathological. I have some weird by today's standards values, standards and morals

Are you a snob about some things?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you have a dark and morbid sense of humor?

 Occasionally

 Occasionally

How important is it to you that your partner smell good?

 Important-ish

 Very damn important

Answer

Would you rather know everything about your mate, or be regularly surprised?

If you were to die, would whoever goes through your personal belongings be shocked by what they find?

 No.

 No.

Do you enjoy television or movies more?

 movies

 movies

Would you strongly prefer to go out with someone of your own skin color / racial background?

 No

 No

Do you like cats? Would you consider owning a cat as a pet?

 Yes, I would love (or do own) a cat.

 I'm not too into them, but I wouldn't mind one.

How long do your romantic relationships usually last?

 12+ months

 12+ months

How important is it that your partner be willing and able to participate in meaningful philosophical conversations?

 Somewhat important.

 Extremely important.

Answer

In your ideal sexual encounter, do you take control, or do they?

Answer

Do you ever drink alcohol in order to lower your inhibitions with the opposite sex?

Answer

Do you own any dice with more than six sides?

Do you like going to poetry readings?

 Occasionally / I'd try it

 Occasionally / I'd try it

Facial hair on guys ...

 Okay.

 Okay.

Can you cook?

 Yes, with a cook book.

 Yes, with a cook book.

Is love overrated?

 No, it's fine.

 No, it's fine.

Could you date someone who needs a great deal of alone time?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Does fashion matter to you?

 A little

 A little

Would you date someone who was currently in a relationship, knowing that you would "be a secret?"

 Absolutely NOT.

 Absolutely NOT.

Would you go out with a smoker?

 No

 No

Do you have a problem with racist jokes?

 No

 No Only if they are coming from a racist

Are you a good liar?

 No

 No Ugh if you're a good liar, you're probably lying on this questionaire

On average, which best describes how often you GET WICKED DRUNK?

 Seldom or never.

 Seldom or never.

In terms of sex, how experienced would your ideal mate be (with people other than you)?

 Moderately Experienced

 Very Experienced

Do you attempt to conserve water, energy or other resources during your everyday life?

 Sometimes

 Yes, almost always

How often do you keep your promises?

 Always

 Whenever possible I think that people who are accountable don't make promises, they do what they say they will, no promise necessary. Promises are a tool for con artists to persuade.

Are you really into Anime (Japanese Animation) movies?

 No

 No

Would you like to be the supreme ruler of all people on Earth?

 No.

 No.

How interested would you be in knowing the details of a partner's sexual history?

 Somewhat interested.

 Not interested.

Imagine being all alone in the great outdoors, miles from anyone, with no communication device. Nobody knows where you are.

 This is something I would like.

 This is something I would like.

How do you feel about people with past addictions?

 A little hesitant

 A little hesitant

When you are angry or frustrated, do you ever throw, smash, kick, hit inanimate objects (non-living things)?

 Never

 Never

What do you think of laws that make smoking illegal in bars and restaurants?

 I support the laws

 I support the laws

Would the world be a better place if people with low IQs were not allowed to reproduce?

 No

 No

Answer

Do you prefer hardcore or softcore when it comes to your porn?

Which of the following would you rather discuss with someone you just met?

 Musical preferences.

 Musical preferences.

etb1983's public match questions

Go public

Say you've started seeing someone you really like. As far as you're concerned, how long will it take before you have sex?

 Answer publicly to see my public answer

 6 or more dates

Would you be comfortable being poor for the rest of your life?

 No

 No

Answer

Once you take a moral position, can anything be said or done to change your mind?

Answer

Would you rather have more money or more freedom?

Does netspeak (e.g., afk, brb, How RU?, lol, rotfl, ttyl, etc.) bother you?

 Some of the time - It depends.

 No.

Do you like horror movies?

 Yes

 Yes

For you personally, is abortion an option in case of an accidental pregnancy?

 Yes

 No I have no need to tell anyone else how to live, nor do I want to be with someone who believes they know enough to run other people's lives

Which, on you, is closest to perfection?

 Your mind

 Your soul

Are you an adventurous eater? Do you like to try new foods and ethnic cuisines?

 Yes, all the time.

 Yes, all the time.

Will you teach your children to believe in Santa?

 Yes

 Yes

Can anything be made the subject of a joke?

 Yes, anything can be funny in the right light.

 Yes, anything can be funny in the right light.

If your partner needed lovemaking to always be gentle, would you be fine with this?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Do you think drug use with your partner can be a romantic activity?

 No

 No

Could you date someone who already has children from a previous relationship?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

If a blind date used a coupon while paying for dinner, how would you feel?

In the line Wherefore art thou Romeo?, what does wherefore mean?

 Where

 Where

Go public

How often do you masturbate?

 Answer publicly to see my public answer

 Once a day or more

Answer

Can a person be too cheerful?

Answer

Do you have a checklist of mandatory traits that you absolutely require in any significant other?

Imagine you're having the perfect conversation with your ideal partner. What are you doing?

 Telling stories

 Making plans

Could you date someone who never, ever, threw anything away?

 No

 No

Do you enjoy crude humor, dirty jokes, and the like?

 Usually, yes.

 Usually, yes.

Do you put more weight in science or faith?

 Science

 Equally in both

Answer

Are you fascinated with all things dark and macabre?

Answer

If you found out your partner was cheating on you, would you cheat on them in revenge?

Go public

Regardless of future plans, what's more interesting to you right now?

 Answer publicly to see my public answer

 True love

Which is the greatest compliment you could receive?

 That you are extremely fun to be with

 That you are extremely fun to be with

How important is it for you to make physical contact when showing affection for someone?

 Very important.

 Very important.

How long can you go without sexual release?

 More than a day, less than a week.

 More than a day, less than a week.

What do you think when you hear the word 'cell'?

 Cellular phone

 Cellular phone

When you first talk online with someone, which of the following would you prefer to talk about?

 Personal history or experiences.

 Activities. I like to keep phone calls more formal and save more intimate discussions for after a connection has been established

Answer

Which would you rather lose?

Answer

If I saw someone checking my boyfriend/girlfriend out, I'd feel more:

If you were to get married, would you want your partner to change his or her last name to yours?

 I would want them to make their own decision.

 No.

How often do you do things out of spite?

 Rarely.

 Never.

Are your birth parents divorced?

 No

 They were never married!

How do you feel about kids?

 Kids are precious - they love me and I love them!

 Kids are precious - they love me and I love them!

Are you concerned with your image and the way others perceive you?

 A little bit

 A little bit

And how frequently do you drink alcohol? (NOTE: You can change your public answers to substance questions on your profile page.)

 Sometimes

 Rarely

In general, how content are you with your own appearance?

 Somewhat content.

 Very content.

Your significant other's ex is coming into town and he/she wants to go out to dinner with them alone. How do you react?

 Not thrilled, but go ahead.

 Not thrilled, but go ahead.

You're up against a nearly impossible challenge. Your ideal partner....

 ...pushes you hard to succeed.

 ...pushes you hard to succeed. I would really prefer they stand by and be supportive without judging or expecting me to fail

Have you ever purchased a math textbook purely for your own enjoyment?

 No.

 Yes. Do Godel, Escher, Bach and The Physics of Immortality count?

Answer

If you had to choose ONLY one, would you rather...

Would you like to receive pain during sex?

 No

 No

Answer

"I don't lie, I just don't say all that I could!" Is this the same as lying?

Would you consider sleeping with someone on the first date?

 Yes

 No

What would be more likely to bother you in a relationship?

 Not enough affection

 Not enough affection

Are you annoyed by tardiness?

 Yes

 Yes

How often do you gamble?

 Rarely.

 Never.

Which is more appealing?

 A life of accomplishment

 A life of accomplishment

Would you need to sleep with someone before you considered marrying them?

 Yes

 Yes

Say you're with someone you really care about, and they reveal their deepest, darkest secret. Which of the following would be most likely to scare you away?

 A bad temper.

 A mild mental illness.

How often do you get angry?

 Rarely

 Sometimes

What is your opinion of sarcasm?

 I like it or love it.

 It's okay. I love irony

What's worse on a first date?

 Nothing to talk about

 Nothing to talk about

Beards - cool or ugly?

 Depends

 Depends

Answer

Do you believe in reincarnation?

How much influence or control do your parents have over your life?

 I consider their opinion but go my own way.

 I am my own person.

If you and a partner lived alone together, how much time would you spend naked while in your home?

 Less than half of the time.

 All of the time.

In your current music collection, do you have more independent artists or big name superstars?

 A mix of both

 A mix of both

Which event sounds most appealing?

 Music Festival

 Music Festival

Do you Google someone before a first date?

 No. Why spoil the mystery?

 Yes. Knowledge is power! I hadn't before, but its a good idea

Would the fact that a partner insisted you were perfect (had no faults) and refused to acknowledge your shortcomings, bother you?

 Yes

 Yes

Is it ever okay to kill another human being?

 Yes, to save your own life.

 Yes.

Would you date someone who has served considerable time in prison?

 No

 No

Answer

If you were really, really drunk, which of the following would you be more likely to do?

Would you date someone who was already in a committed relationship with someone else?

 No, it's wrong.

 No, it's wrong.

Answer

Do you like to go clubbing?

Imagine you have a partner who is able to provide financially for you and any children. Would you consider taking a stay-at-home role?

 Yes.

 No.

Which would you rather choose: peace on earth or loads of money?

Is there anything that science will never be able to explain?

 Yes

 Yes

Some religions are more correct than others.

 False

 False I only care about people's religion when they are trying to infringe on other people's religion

Do you usually feel the need to shower or bathe after having sex?

 No.

 No.

Answer

What's more important to you?

Would you consider connecting with someone whose relationship status is 'seeing someone' or 'married'?

 No to both

 Yes to 'seeing someone' only So long as "seeing" is not engaged

If you turn a left-handed glove inside out, it fits...

 On my right hand

 On my left hand It would depend on the fabric. Some gloves are made to fit on either hand

Would you date a single parent?

 Yes

 Yes

Is it possible for someone to really be 'too nice'?

 Yes.

 Yes.

If you saw a man knitting in public what would you think?

 He's just secure in his masculinity.

 He's gay.

etb1983's public match questions

On weekends / days off, do you like to get out and make the most of the day, or do you prefer to sleep late and relax?

 It varies

 It varies

If you don't do anything at all for an entire day, how does that make you feel?

 Bad

 Bad

How do you feel about falling in love?

 I like to just let it happen

 I like to just let it happen

Answer

"Your a bitch!" What bothers you more about the above sentence?

Answer

Which type of education would you prefer for your children?

Would you ever consider dating a Catholic?

 Yes

 Yes

How do you feel about government-subsidized food programs (free lunch, food stamps, etc.)?

 It's ok - if it is not abused

 No problem

If one of your potential matches was overweight, would that be a dealbreaker?

 Yes, but only if they were obese.

 Yes, but only if they were obese.

What volume level do you usually prefer when listening to music?

 Somewhere in the middle.

 Somewhere in the middle.

Which of the following has the biggest influence on your behavior?

 Reason, Observation, Empiricism, Trial-And-Error.

 Reason, Observation, Empiricism, Trial-And-Error.

In a certain light, wouldn't nuclear war be exciting?

 No, it wouldn't.

 No, it wouldn't.

Jealousy: healthy or unhealthy, in the context of a relationship?

 Unhealthy

 Unhealthy

Would you consider living with a partner who does not want any pets?

 Yes.

 Yes.

STALE is to STEAL as 89475 is to...

 89547

 89547

Have you experienced mental illness?

 No

 No

Is marriage a necessity for two people who love each other?

 No

 No

Regardless of your actual age, do you consider yourself to be an adult?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Do you believe that money can buy happiness?

 No.

 No.

How often are you open with your feelings?

 Usually

 Always

Gay marriage -- should it be legal?

 Yes

 Yes

Are you turned off when your lover farts, complains about bowel movements, or exhibits any other human characteristics as such?

 No

 No

Do humans and modern primates (apes, chimps, etc) share a common evolutionary ancestor?

 Yes

 Yes

What do you think of reality television?

 I dislike it.

 It's alright.

Do you have a problem with people who wear fur clothing?

 No.

 No.

Answer

Is a guy who's slept with 100 girls a bad person?

Videotaping your own sexcapades is...

 ...something I would try (or did try)

 ...something I would try (or did try)

If it were legal to do so, would you ever consider paying for sex?

 No.

 Yes.

Would you do a striptease for your mate?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you believe that art and literature courses are important to students, even if they are majoring in other fields?

 Yes, absolutely.

 Yes, absolutely.

Answer

Do you like the taste of blood?

Is it possible to have a true relationship, friend or otherwise, with someone you've never met in person?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

Have your sexual interests become kinkier as you've grown older?

How well do you handle criticism?

 Really well

 Really well

How would you feel if your significant other made more money than you?

 Very comfortable

 Very comfortable

Does it annoy you when an OkCupid user has no pictures that show their face?

 Yes

 Yes

Would you be happy raising the kids while your spouse worked?

 Yes

 No

Answer

Would you enjoy going fishing with your partner?

Do you typically speak and write in a clear, precise manner?

 Yes, almost always.

 Yes, almost always.

Do you pick up after yourself? Be honest.

 Yeah, when I have the time.

 Yeah, when I have the time.

What is your favorite transportation medium?

 Land (trains, buses, cars, bikes, feet, etc.)

 Other. I love walking

Do overweight people annoy you?

 No

 No

Do you want your partner to be kinkier than you?

 Yes

 No

Answer

Have you ever had sex in a place where there was a high risk of being caught?

How much can intelligence turn you on?

 A lot!

 A lot!

Answer

Do trees have souls?

How many children would you ideally like to have?

 1-2

 3-4

A college-level education is...

 Nice, but not mandatory

 Necessary

When you are sleeping, do you prefer:

 A cool room

 A warm room

Do you enjoy finding out what makes things work the way they do?

 I'm an information sponge

 I'm an information sponge

If you like someone a lot, do you usually ask them out?

 Yes

 No

Do you have any tattoos?

 I have no tattoos

 I have no tattoos

Is it more important to you that you are tactful, or truthful?

 Truthful

 Truthful

When it comes to music, do you have a strong preference for male or female vocals?

 No, not really.

 Yes - female vocals.

Answer

Is it okay to answer your cell phone while out with a friend or on a date?

Are you smarter than most people?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you dream of travelling the world or are you happy where you are?

 Where's my ticket?

 Where's my ticket?

If you were dating somebody that you met online, would you be reluctant to tell your friends?

 No, not at all.

 No, not at all.

Regardless of whether or not you smoke marijuana, do you think it should be legalized for adults?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

When you're not in a serious relationship, what do you prefer?

How would you feel if a significant other forgot your birthday, nameday, anniversary, or something else similarly important to you?

 Disappointed.

 Disappointed.

Is a girl who's slept with 100 guys a bad person?

 No

 No Many women are forced into prostitution, against their will

People who throw cigarette butts out of their car window...

 Are being insensitive and/or rude

 Are being insensitive and/or rude

Answer

Do you consider astrology to be a legitimate science?

When men show extra courtesy toward women (opening doors, pulling out chairs, etc.), this is:

 Admirable and desirable. Chivalry's not dead.

 Admirable and desirable. Chivalry's not dead.

Comittment to personal growth is:

 Critically important.

 Critically important.

Would you ever consider cutting a partner (who asked for it) in sexual play?

 No

 No

Can you remember the names of everyone you've ever had sex with?

 Yes.

 Yes.

At the movies, do you stay for the credits?

 Sometimes.

 Sometimes.

Would you date someone who kept a gun in the house?

 Yes

 Yes So long as they had it in a safe and it was not accessible to children

Would you ever seriously date someone twice your age?

 No

 No

ould you have respect for someone after having sex with them on the first meeting/date?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Answer

Are you currently employed?

Are you happy with your life?

 Yes

 Yes I assume everyone is answering this questions to pit forth the best representative. I take it all with a grain of salt

Answer

If your partner had a foot fetish, would you include it in your sex life?

If you had your own private hot tub, would you go nude in it?

 Yes, but only when alone or with someone special.

 Yes, always.

Is art important to you?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

What type of humor do you enjoy most?

Are you annoying?

 No

 No

Do you know how to drive a stick shift (manual transmission)?

 Yes

 Yes

Overall, do you think that what you do (or plan to do) for a living makes the world a better or worse place?

 Better.

 Better.

How often do you brush your teeth?

 Twice or more a day

 Once a day

Are you more attracted to virgins?

 No

 No

Are you annoyed by people who are super logical?

 No

 No

Right this minute, how clean is your main personal bathroom, (say the one you use every morning when you wake up in your own bed)?

 Clean-ish but could use a quick touch-up.

 Clean-ish but could use a quick touch-up.

Should wealthier people pay higher taxes?

 Yes

 Yes

Who played the biggest role in raising you?

 My mother.

 Another relative. I hope you were raised and not by wild animals. I don't want to insult wolves

Has anyone ever accused you of being "too clingy"?

 No.

 No.

Answer

Would you ever eat something out of the trash?

Do you ever not feel like having sex because you feel too unattractive or too unappealing?

 No, never.

 Yes, but only rarely.

The idea of gay and lesbian couples having children is:

 Acceptable.

Do you think you could ever enjoy being humiliated as part of a sexual experience?

 No.

 No.

How are your teeth?

 Okay

 Perfect

Would you ever date someone that is HIV positive?

 No

 No

Does the idea of flipping a coin to make important life decisions appeal to you?

 No

 No

Are you careful with your money?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

Would you date someone purely on the fact that they were well endowed?

Do you like to cuddle?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Would you prefer to be a financial success or to remain true to your principles?

 I'll stick with my principles, thanks.

 I'll stick with my principles, thanks.

What is worse, being poor or alone?

 Alone

 Poor

Can overweight people still be sexy?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you think physical love is necessary for happiness in life?

 Yes

 Yes

Would you really like to stay home and spend an entire day (24 hours) in bed (getting up only for the necessities) with your ideal significant other?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Cell phones: good or evil?

 Good

 Evil They are useful and convenient. I have several, but I recognize that they are part of the end of privacy that we are moving towards because we are all capable of being surveilled at anytime.

Which makes for a better first date?

 Coffee and chit-chat

 Coffee and chit-chat

Would you and your ideal match eventually feel comfortable farting around each other?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

Would you prefer to have one true love forever, or lots of fun and meaningful relationships?

Answer

When deciding what is right and wrong you are:

Answer

What is the farthest you have/would go in a game of strip poker?

How often do you tweet?

 Never

 Rarely

How important to you is a potential match's sense of humor?

 Very important.

 Very important.

Do you think homosexuality is a sin?

 No

 No

Answer

Which is a bigger deal for you?

Answer

Would you ever engage in a sexual activity you didn't enjoy, just because your partner did?

What is next in this series? 1, 4, 10, 19, 31, _

 46

 46

Is it okay for a girl to talk openly about her sexual exploits?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

I find myself in fights with authority figures...

Should you _have_ to know about your partner's previous sexual exploits?

 No, the past is the past.

 No, the past is the past.

Are you a pet person?

 Yes

 No

Would you date someone who was very into fantasy novels?

 Yes

 Maybe

If you were going to have a child, would you want the other parent to be of the same ethnicity as you?

 This would not be an important factor to me.

 This would not be an important factor to me.

How do you feel about germs?

How much communication is ideal during sex?

 Just enough to get things right.

 Just enough to get things right.

If you got married, would you change your name?

 No

 No

Would it bother you if someone you are dating has a lot of close friends of the opposite sex?

 No.

 No.

Which is more important for a good match?

 Having good sex

 Having good sex

Outside of work and school, how inclined are you to investigate something that interests you?

 Very inclined

 Very inclined

How willing are you to meet someone from OkCupid in person?

 Totally willing! I'm not here for a chat room experience.

 Totally willing! I am not looking for a pen pal. I will not respond to people without photos. I prefer speaking to chatting and emailing

Answer

Do you have rape fantasies?

Answer

Compassion is:

Do you believe that falling in love with someone you have talked or written to but have never met is the most genuine way to come to love a person?

 No

 No

Are you the type of person to tell a homeless person to get a job?

 No

 No

Does it bother you when people are late?

 Sometimes, it depends upon the circumstances.

 Yes, always.

Do you say grace before meals?

 No

 No

Does spending Friday or Saturday night at home annoy you?

 No

 No

What is the most exciting thing about getting to know someone new?

 Discovering your shared interests

 Discovering your shared interests Bodies falter, minds can grow forever

Not as in whips and chains, but in general, do you prefer your partner to be...

 Balanced

 Balanced

How much would you dress up for a first date with someone you met on OkCupid?

 I'd try to look nice.

 I'd go all out.

Have you ever lied to a partner about your sexual history?

 No

 No

How frequently do you bathe or shower?

 At least once a day.

 At least once a day.

Is there at least one nude photo of you on the Net?

 No

 Yes

Who's smarter on average?

 Neither; they're the same on average

 Neither; they're the same on average

Is long hair on a guy inappropriate?

 No

 Yes

Would it ever be ok to break up with someone using email?

 No.

 No.

Which is more important in a healthy relationship?

 Total openness

 Maintaining privacy

Answer

Do you enjoy giving oral sex?

The life of one of your fellow citizens is more valuable than the lives of ten foreigners.

 False

 False

Do you believe that there exists a statistical correlation between race and intelligence?

 No

 No

Do you say 'Thank you' to wait staff when served in a restaurant?

 Always.

 Always.

Are geeks sexy?

 Yes

 Yes

Answer

Have you been faithful in all of your past relationships?

Are you squeamish about sharing food or beverages with the person you're dating?

 No

 No

Answer

How many continents are there?

If you meet someone and they are everything you are looking for, except their body type, do you give them a chance?

 Yes

 Yes

Could you date someone who wasn't sure what they wanted to do with their life?

 Yes

 Yes Only if it applied to the future because they were presently doing 'something" with their life

Are you afraid of falling madly in love?

 No.

 No.

Where would you prefer to live?

 A modest house in a nice neighborhood.

 A modest house in a nice neighborhood.

Answer

Half of all policemen are thieves and half of all policemen are murderers. Does it follow logically that all policemen are criminals?

Are you a virgin?

 No

 No

Do you chew with your mouth open?

 No

 No

Answer

Are some sex acts with consenting adults inherently wrong or immoral? Assume no unusual risk of injury.

Would you date a transsexual?

 No

 No

Answer

Which is longer?

Do you wear expensive designer clothes?

 No

 Yes

Have you ever been in love?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you enjoy exercise?

 Yes

 Yes

Manners are:

 Important

 Important

Which is worse?

 Someone who is ALWAYS sad

 Someone who is ALWAYS sad

Answer

Do you feel guilty or bad after having sex?

Did you join OkCupid just so you could find people to have sex with?

 No

 No

Would you date someone who doesn't own a car?

 Yes

 Yes

Are you Jewish?

 No

 No

Are you aware of the existence of any nude photos of yourself on the Internet?

 No.

 Yes.

People who like RECEIVING anal sex are...

 Exploring their sexuality to the full

 Exploring their sexuality to the full

Answer

Would you be willing to engage in mutual masturbation with someone? You would be pleasing yourself and watching them do the same, but no touching each other.

Do you spend more money on clothes or food?

 Food

 Food

Who most often does your laundry?

 I do it myself.

 A laundry service does it.

Do you feel there are any circumstances in which a person is obligated to have sex with you?

 No

 No

Is astrological sign at all important in a match?

 No

 No I'm an air sign. Fire and air well...

Answer

Are you married, engaged to be married, or in a relationship that you believe will lead to marriage?

Which of the following best describes Science, in your opinion?

Are Sex and Intimacy the same thing?

 No

 No

Answer

Is anything in life more important than your own self-interest?

How easily are you offended?

 Not very easily.

 Not very easily.

Answer

Would you be comfortable masturbating in front of a partner?

Do you only date people with athletic and toned bodies?

 No

 No

Should your mate also become your best friend?

 Yes

 No

Would you date someone who was always optimistic?

 Definitely!

 Definitely!

Would you consider a serious relationship with someone who couldn't have or produce children?

 Yes

 Yes

Do you believe that regular sex is necessary in maintaining a healthy relationship?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Do you believe contraception is morally wrong?

 No

 No

Has anyone ever accused you of being "high maintenance"?

 No.

 Yes.

Is it generally acceptable to you for a sex partner to initiate foreplay while you are sleeping?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Have you ever had a sexual encounter with someone of the same sex?

 No, and I would never.

 No, and I would never.

Is it okay to live with someone you're dating, even before you're engaged or married?

 Yes

 Yes

Is interracial marriage a bad idea?

 No

 No

Do you enjoy intense intellectual conversations?

 Yes

 Yes

Which is bigger?

 The sun

 The sun

Are you a Buddhist?

 No

 No

Are you vegetarian or vegan?

 No

 No

Do you think it is possible for someone to be an Atheist and still have a solid moral framework by which to live?

 Yes.

 Yes.

Are you an intellectual? In the context of this question, intellectual means someone who loves learning, often for its own sake.

 Yes

 Yes

Do you feel that having sex with someone you have known less than one year would be too soon?

 No.

 No.

Do you practice Hinduism?

 No

 No

Would you date someone shorter than you?

 Yes

 Yes